Saturday, June 1, 2013

When Green Arrow Thought He Was Popeye Doyle

So Green Arrow and Black Canary have busted "The Four Horsemen," leaders of an "international narcotics cartel," and prevented one billion dollars worth of heroin from coming into Star City.

Good on you, guys! Now all that's left is to go to the point where the drugs were going to come into the city and...








Shall we go over the litany of bad ideas and inane assumptions here?

**While the sentiment is nice, having a bunch of recovering teenage addicts handle a billion dollars worth of heroin cannot be a good idea...Would you have let Speedy help you with that? Although I'm sure that NONE of the product when missing during the photo op, and no one suffered a relapse as a result. Nope, nobody...

**No one ever called it "The Star City Smack Party." No one. Ever.

**Ollie, by throwing all the dope into the bay (or ocean, or fjord, or whatever Star City has), aren't you destroying all the evidence? Won't this result in the perps walking? Ollie? OLLIE!?!?!

Hmm, I guess he can't hear me over the "flamboyant war whoops."

**Uhh, is pouring a billion dollars worth of heroin into the water good for the environment? The fishing industry? Swimmers? Star City's water supply? Really, this seems like a spectacularly bad idea.

**Then again, for the most part it looks as if they're not cutting the bags open before throwing them into the water...which probably means all the heroine will be their for whatever criminals can get scuba gear and go gather it. So you've just made Black Manta a billionaire, Ollie. No wonder he can afford all the fab sea gear...

**By the way, given 1970s pricing (roughly $180,000/pound), one billion dollars of heroin would be about 5500 pounds. It's going to take you and your junkie recovering addict teens quite a while to throw that much in the bay...[For reference, the worlds' largest officially recorded heroin bust was in San Francisco in 1991, when 59 cases of heroin weighing 1080 pounds had a street value of $3 billion...inflation, you know...]

**"There will be no more narcotics traffic in Star City..." Oh, Green Arrow (and Elliot S! Maggin), how thunderously silly. And dismantling the French Connection ended all heroin traffic in NYC on Earth-Prime, too...

2 comments:

Mr. Whiskas said...

"is pouring a billion dollars worth of heroin into the water good for the environment? "

Joker ain't the only one that can make a bunch of grinning fish!

The odd thing about GA's anti-drug stories is that of the DC characters he always struck me as the one that probably indulged in some drug use. Apart from the entire 60's hippie vibe they gave him just check out that goatee!

snell said...

I suspect this incident might have influenced Ollie's drug attitudes...