Monday, August 23, 2010

Manic Monday Bonus--The REAL Reason Not To Store Our Nuclear Waste In Yucca Mountain

I just wanted to revisit the story from last week's Friday Night Fights, because even by DC 1970s standards, this story is so batsh^&* insane that you really need to know about it.

Long recap short: In DC Comics Presents #12 (1979), Mister Miracle has learned of an Intergang plot to kill Superman, but is "hypnotically blocked" from warning him or even mentioning the plot to anyone.

His solution--goad Superman into a highly publicized pay-per-view fight in Las Vegas, to induce Intergang to attack Superman there; and then trick Superman into flying the wrong way home, so Miracle can take out the crooks and their evil machines himself.

Seriously.

But even better, is how Scott Free decides to trick Superman into flying the wrong way home. You'd best be sitting down for this...as Superman arrives for the fight:

Got that? Superman just has to follow that mountain range to get back to Vegas. And after Kal-El puts Miracle down:

See...he's following the mountain range back to Las Vegas.

So what's the trick? How did Superman get lost? Well, get ready for the end-of-issue explanations...and please, put down any sharp objects:



HE SANK AN ENTIRE MOUNTAIN RANGE INTO THE GROUND, AND SUPERMAN NEVER EVEN NOTICED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Wow, I guess Scott Free really was raised by Darkseid, because that is an Apokalyptan approach to a problem if ever there was one.

Of course, there is never any follow up to the suddenly absent mountain range...nothing on the environmental, geological, or even the navigational consequences. No legal repercussions, or congressional hearings. No Nevadans ticked off at a self-declared "New God" radically altering their landscape. Nope, in the pre-Crisis DC Universe, you're allowed to do stuff like that, without recrimination or reprisal!! (Of course, maybe Superman just "put it back" afterward...)

I just have the following questions for author Steve Englehart:

A) How likely is it that Superman, with all of his super senses, would not notice AN ENTIRE MOUNTAIN RANGE BEING SUNK INTO THE EARTH BY A SERIES OF HUGE EXPLOSIONS, even if it was during a fight and a storm? This is a guy who can hear Lois scream while a continent away while fighting Metallo...and he can't hear AN ENTIRE MOUNTAIN RANGE exploding right behind him?

B) How dumb is Superman, really?

C) There's no less convoluted way Mister Miracle could have used to get Superman to fly the wrong way after the fight? Really, major geological upheaval is the only way you could come up with?

D) Do you know what a mountain range is, sir?

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